Saturday, January 18, 2014

Boss hanyalah posmen

(This was written on 19/1)

I am writing this from a condo's balcony overlooking the open sea.With scenic view and the sound of wave crashing the shore, the best word to describe this feeling is .....blessed. The irony part was i just had the same experience last week overlooking the same sea, but from a diffferent shore with different set of people.

I just had yet another conversation with ny colleague about the things that we thought would have gone better with a better leadership. This time was regarding endless work related issues due to different expectation from different level of people in the organisation. We acknowledged that the difference is a norm,but what about the actions to make ends meet?

When all reasons and evidences had resurfaced,we've nobody else to blame but the BOSS.It's always the boss(es) who are incompetent,cruel,heartless,not understanding gen Y, not this and not that. And it is a known fact that most popular reason on our friends' resignation is due to the boss factor. So when there is an obvious target, why bother finding other factor to support the hypothesis?

These few weeks I' ve the opportunity to work on a paper  to be presented to my higher management. Prior to the seating,we were required to have syndication sessions with every one of committee members to obtain mutual agreement prior to the real papee. During these sessions that I slowly realised the rationale of some decisions made by them, and how some idea, no matter how brilliant it was from our own point of view,might not be that good from the eyes of others. The management were trained to think like this,not focusing but always consider the negative impact of everything.My father in law,a military officer once told me that the army are also trained this way so they are better prepared and always in the alert mode incase anything goes wrong to our nation's security.

So the main question is, IS boss the one to be blamed in most situation in the office?

Not shoving the leadership factor aside, we (the gen y) always believe that our bosses need to improve on the leadership skills. BUT never forget that we also need to improve OURSELVES in terms of trying to understand and showing good manners to the elderly. It was worrying when I saw before my eyes that some people I know did not really respect the boss.Some did not informed when coming late to office or even taking leave,did not greet the bosses when they meet at the corridors,did not bother to compose nice sentences in emails.. and the list goes on and on.The selfish and 'I am always right no matter what' attitude need to be improved, my dear friends. A reminder to myself too if ever i cross the line.In simple words,jaga adab kita.

Because the truth is, boss(es) are just postmans - messengers of what had been laid down by our Ultimate Boss. If you dont like your workplace for whatever reason,make a move.Kan simple like that.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Count My Calories

1.       I observed that my weight had gain for no significant reason these past few weeks. I suspect the steak feast everytime hubby was at home. Tapi recently he just came home once per month so the hypothesis might not be quite accurate. The most probably reason I think of the excessive sugary food intake I had recently.. few times per week I got myself either a bag of Famous Amos choc chip, A piece of Famous Amous soft cookie, A Chatime horlick cocoa, a Gong Cha signature wintermelon tea, the various imported choc that is easily available at my workplace, and the list goes on.


2.       So I embarked on a personal food watch programme to obtain my previous weight and for a leaner, ideal figure. You know, my Mummy tummy has yet to actually disappear even after I year 8 months of giving birth, hence I need to start somewhere, and now.


3.       Previously I love to run on the threadmill everytime I went to the gym or at home. However I believe I need to focus on specific work out to flatten the tummy and strengthen my mid body. Hence, I started my Youtube work out (exercise with Youtube videos from fitness coach) and my favourite is from HasFit. I managed to do 3 sessions per week, however my target is actually everyday ! Gotta work harder and discipline myself. Besides, I tried to do sit up/crunch up everyday, walaupun ade few times miss jugak but at least I tried.Now able to do 50x per session, will increase slowly but surely.


4.       And I resumed my favourite past time (once upon a time) which is calorie counting. Although there are a few thoughts about this, I am comfortable to stick to the following rules :

i)                    Women need about 200-250 kcal every meal, while men need about 300-350kcal every meal. This is ideal for people in office environment, of course it would be different if you lead a very active lifestyle.

ii)                   We need to eat 3-4 times a day. That means about 5-6 serving per day. And proper meal and snacks are just the same!! It is interchangeable and consumable at any meal time.

iii)                 The aim is to balance the sugar level in our blood. If it is very low we won't have enough energy, and if it is too high we will feel heavy and sleepy

iv)                 If you feel full when it comes to meal time, try to cut your food serving into half or quarter. If you feel very hungry that means your previous meal is not enough to satisfy your body needs. Make sure you feel just right after each meal.


5.       I cut my intake of chocolates and replaced it with granola bars and biskut kering. I make sure I have the snacks with me all the time so I won't be starving and started to crave for sweet sugary food. One of the trainer from Youtube mentioned that the sweet food craving was resulted of not enough sugar in your body.


6.       OK! Time to work out. Bye bye!

Wednesday, January 01, 2014

Good start to 2014

Alhamdulillah this morning was a breeze and according to my ideal plan.
1. Amna slept early last night, at 11 pm (this is early for her!). Maybe too tired because she main basikal with her cousins and the travelling time from Seremban. Managed to switch off the light (I always wanted to do this every night but Amna would cry and scream once the light was off). Both of us slept soundly all night.
2. Woke up at 5.30 am and switch off the alarm (luckily this time I don't ignore it as i usually do, azam tahun baru beb). I was touched with one stranger's words from facebook that most Muslims nowadays are afraid to wake up before Subuh, takut tak cukup tidur and ngantuk pegi office. End up ramai orang akan solat subuh lewat dan yang lelaki tak dapat solat Subuh berjemaah. Statement ni I rasa macam kena lempang je sebab I felt exactly like that before. Kadang2 saja set alarm kul 6.30am kononnya takut ngantuk gi office.. makhluk mana la yang menyemai doktrin jahat kepada kita ni. Pastu I went straight to the bathroom to take ablution, then i heard a single scream from the room. I was like alamakkk si kecik ni bangun ke... there goes my tahajud :(
3. Si kecik bangun itu rupanya lapar susu sebab semalam dia tido without minum susu. So lepas habis sebotol susu, she teman Mummy ngaji (she loves to sit on my lap when I am reciting Quran or zikir after solat). Since she is in a good mood, I distracted her with her favourite videos and applications (for time like this, I thank God for a magic gadget called Tab/iPad. What I hate was when the girl is playing with her toys or reading books, somebody suddenly `lure' her with Cartoon videos on hp/tab. I am soo pissed off when things like this happen!!). Managed to perform solat2 sunat and Subuh and recited Al Mathurat.'
4. At 6.30am, I ironed the clothes and got ready to work while the little girl was occupied with her toys. I even managed to do sit ups! 
5. Kissed the girl good bye and head to office at 7.30am. I love the morning breeze :) Then baru perasan my car was not at my MIL's house.. so she had to send me to my house to get my car. Muka maintain relax je padahal da gelabah da mula2 tadi takut kereta kena curi. Hahah
6. Arrived at office by 8am.. no boss and not much work today. Kejap lagi boleh dhuha and petang boleh balik at 5pm... yeayy alhamdulillah.
7. This is the ideal work routine that I always wanted. It might be a normal day to some of you, but it is not very easy or too normal for me due to many reasons.Hope I can istiqamah..please pray for me. I pray for you too :) 

Sleep Deprived Mommy

1.       I am blessed with anak yang takdelah susah sangat and takdelah senang sangat nak tidurkan dia.. tapi bila datang tantrum dia or perangai taknak tido memang boleh buat pening kepala and rasa nak marah je.


2.       She started to test me when she was just days old. She refused to sleep alone, and even letak sekejap pun tak boleh. Always love to sleep dalam pelukan and nurse almost 24/7. So the idea of having a baby cot is impossible. I guess this condition is quite normal for new babies as they are still adjusting to the new world.


3.       After a month, she has a new habit of crying every night before sleep. Even after she just had her milk, cleaned and dry, she cried every night without fail. I was so nervous when I imagined what would happen once I get back to work. My fear did come true. She continued her habit every night and Mummy had a permanent eye bag under my eyes. The only good part at this time was Mummy got back to pre pregnancy weight without much effort, other than that inilah masa ujian hebat untuk first time Mummy. Lepas dah penat menangis and tidur, it was Mummy's turn to cry pulak menangisi nasib. Huhu


4.       After the third months onward, Alhamdulillah dah tak nangis malam2. Tido pun lama dah malam2 and sekali dua je bangun untuk susu. Mummy had longer sleeps Alhamdulillah.


5.       After enjoying good rest and enough sleep time, the time of berjaga malam started again when she just learned to walk ( for record : Amna started to walk at 1 yr 2 mo). Malam2 pun nak berjalan, keluar masuk bilik. The best part is dia taknak berjalan sorang2, she took Mummy's hand to teman dia berjalan2.


6.       Pastu bila dah start main (umur around 1 yr 3 mo), tidur makin lambat. Bila tidur lambat, bangun pun lambat, kul 12noon kadang2. Then tahan mata main2 lagi taknak tido.. tunggu Mummy balik office then terus ajak masuk bilik to nurse and sleep. This is usually around 6.30pm.. then tido la dia sampai 8.00pm. Kemudian bila bangun energetic macam baru bangun pagi plak so the ritual goes on and on.. sometimes tido kul 2.30am!!


7.       These few days were the most challenging for me. My inlaws balik kampong so I need to ask for my parents favour to look after Amna. And this means I need to commute to work from Seremban. Kemudian, datangla perangai dari mana tah dia dapat, pandai merajuk then bila ade benda tak kena sikit mulalah dia melalak and scream at top of her lungs. Contoh kita tutup satu lampu sebab nak tido pun bole jadi sebab. For me, this new experience memang memeningkan. Sebabnya, I am commuting and need to get ready as early as 5.30am. Kalau kul 3am pun belum tido lagi, abis camaner…….


8.       Satu malam yang sangat horror adelah on last 2 nights where Amna dah ngantuk ptg tu but Atuk dia refused to let her sleep, kononnya malam nnti dia boleh tido terus sampai pagi. End up she slept at 9.30pm (after a half an hour tantrum) and woke up at 11.30pm just when I crept beside her to sleep -_- And kalau dah bangun tu.. tau jerlah. Again she refused to play alone, semua ambik tangan Mummy soh ikut and play with her. Bila dah kul 3am, my brain dah cannot fully function. Luckily my Mom let me sleep and she teman my daughter to watch her video. Tetapi at about 4.20am, she felt sleepy and when she saw me sleeping (alone), she screamed and cried agaknye sebab tengok I tak ambik dia tido sekali. I don't really know what time she fell asleep, but what I know is I terpaksa amik half day to work as no way I can wake up at 5.30am and catch the morning bus.


9.       I hope her new habit is just a phase and it would, and NEED to subside sooner before I lose my insanity. I seeked guidance from other parents about this, and tried to implemented their tips, so far none worked! Tried to wake her up early in the morning, and not letting her to nap at night before her sleep time, tried to switch of the lights. None worked. Perhaps I need to try harder.


10.   I don't want to train my anak to sleep at 8 pm coz I am working during the day and I want to spend more time with her. I think sleeping at 10pm would be ideal.. however it's not easy to achieve it realistically… I will continue my research to reset my anak's body clock so we can ensure a happy child and happy Mommy at the same time.